Monday 29 December 2008

Hello


My Favourite advert of the year!

Thursday 11 December 2008

Christmas!

Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas

Thursday 4 December 2008

Minimalism

I would like to live a minimalist lifestyle but I have too much crap!

Monday 24 November 2008

Awesome Things With Moustaches

Mustaches (or moustaches, if you wish) are all the rage these days, but only in an ironic way. I refuse to believe that hot chicks dig guys with staches unless they’ve had sex with their fathers and liked it. Now, ugly chicks I could totally understand, but no way in hell you’ll ever hear a hottie saying she wants to jump a dudes bones because of his facial hair.

That being said, mustaches are so freaking badass and I totally wish I could grow one without looking like a complete dick. Since I’m apparently facially follicly challenged, I spend an unhealthy amount of time admiring the inanimate objects that have sweeter mustaches than I could ever hope for.

Here are some of my fav Moustache things:

Anyone else ever think yellow No. 2 pencils are just way overrated? Fill that pencil box with a set of these classy mustache pencils featuring some of the most famous mustaches ever like Salvador Dali, Burt Reynolds, Clark Gable, and Jean “Django” Reinhardt.



Under normal circumstances, if you’re out drinking and spot a chick with a mustache it’s an instant turn-off (unless you’re some kinda’ weirdo), but if I ever saw a chick with a mustache pint glass, well, I’d just ask her where she got the awesome cup (Psst! She probably got it here!). If the conversation went any further, my wife wouldn’t be too happy.


As if Tom Selleck wasn’t awesome enough with a mustache of his own, could you imagine how effing berserk he’d be if brandished "stached weaponry? I’m almost positive that the universe would implode upon itself due to the sheer cosmic awesomeness.

Monday 10 November 2008

You Don't Know the Deliciousness of the Dark Side!


Mainly because the dark side's crispiness proves a much better surface to spread jam and butter. The toaster is $55 here, but that's a small price to pay for having a nutritious, evil breakfast each morning.

Toast not included but it's a small price to pay from brilliance, I am so getting one!

Monday 3 November 2008

Bastard Gnomes!


If you are dealing with a gnome infestation like i am at the moment, those little bastards keep ripping out my Japanese Maple!, a gruesome trap like this one may be the only solution to the situation. The device is just like a traditional bear trap except, in this case, a watering can serves as “bait.”

Lets get those bastard Gnomes!

Monster Bed!


If I was a kid again I really wish my folks had got me a Bed like this instead of an old crappy normal boring one!

Sunday 2 November 2008

Vending Machine + Ice-Cream = Awesomeness


One of the loves of my life are weird vending machines!
Like come on a machine that's open 24 hours and vends anything!

This machine combines two of my loves; Vending machine + ice-cream = Awesomness!!

Massachusetts-based company, Moobella have devised a vending machine a bit larger than regular Pepsi and Coke vending machines which uses dry ingredents to aerate, flavor, mix and flash freeze a cup of caramel icecream with walnuts or vanilla with cookies and so on.

"Dry" refers to ingredients that can be transported and stored without the need of special trucks. The modular ingredents are stored in hygenic pouches.

The consumer has to feed money per scoop which will be set by the vendor and using the machine's large LCD touchscreen choose from 12 flavours and five mix ins (nuts, cookie crumbles etc). Fourty five seconds of waiting and the machine delivers a freshly made scoop.

Best thing ever!

Tuesday 28 October 2008

Squirrel Kebab!



This story is wrong, now i like a good proper kebab but this ain't for me!
Squirrels are overrunning the countryside of Devon, England, so Chef Ed Chester decided to do something about those pesky critters: he’s making squirrel kebab!

Cook Ed Chester reckons squirrel meat is delicious and is also selling pates and fricassees made from the rodents.

He believes the spread of grey squirrels has damaged the countryside and it is a good idea to eat them to control their numbers.

It's not for me at all! Bleurgh!

Thursday 18 September 2008

I went on my Honeymoon!

I went to Malaysia!

It was a Happy Happy Honeymoooon!

I got Married

I got married! Ta Da!

Fuck Me! It's been a long time since I blogged!

Sorry about this chaps but i had stuff to do!

Tuesday 22 July 2008

RIP Estelle Getty


It's a sad sad day.
Actress Estelle Getty, best known as sarcastic Sicilian octogenarian Sophia Petrillo in US sitcom The Golden Girls, had died at the age of 84.
The star, who had advanced dementia, died on Tuesday morning at her Hollywood Boulevard home.

She was nominated for seven Emmy Awards for The Golden Girls and won the award in 1988 for ‘Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series’.

Getty, who played the oldest of the ‘Golden Girls,’ was actually the second youngest. Bea Arthur (her daughter on the show) is 86 as is former co-star Betty White. Rue McClanahan who played Blanche was the youngest of the four. McClanahan is currently 74-years old.

Sophia was Dorothy’s mom on the show and lived with her, Rose and Blanche in their Miami home. Sophie often called her daughter “Pussycat” and enjoyed poking fun at Blanche’s sex life.

It was one of my Fav shows.

Ugly Bag for YOU!


“This ugly bag is guaranteed to cure ugliness,” the bag reads.

“Directions: Open bag and place over head of ugly person with face side facing forward. Instantly creates beauty where there is none.

“Note: For extra ugly persons, two bags may be necessary in case one breaks.”

The Genuine Ugly Bag in the “Heavy Duty for Extra Ugliness” variety, has a sketch of a woman on it, with petite facial features and a retro winged haircut.

Thursday 17 July 2008

Fridgy Midgy


Don't you hate it when you buy a can of Irn-Bru and it goes warm? Well Here's a super duper mini-fridge made just to fit a 350ml canned drink inside—it's powered by USB, so you can keep it right next to your computer and it'll keep your beverage cold and refreshing throughout the work day. I love it.

I actually might buy this!

Tuesday 15 July 2008

Sorry Dudes

Sorry dudes, I've been so lax at the mo but got shit loads on at the mo!

Saturday 28 June 2008

Best Thing Ever!


This truly would be the best thing to ever have at a party!

This 8-lane set up, which you can rent not buy, gives a good idea of what is possible with their track parts.
This thing has beer-fueled parties (full of abundant bromance) written all over it.

Sunday 8 June 2008

For all you Wankers!

Handz Off Anti-Masturbatory Cream: Side Effects Include Blindness

If anti-masturbatory gum hasn’t done the trick for you, try a more direct approach with this Handz Off Cream. This special blend of coconut, buttermilk and vanilla bean will leave your junk silky smooth and it will fight your urges for up to 6 hours. Apply liberally and vigorously to affected areas.
Warning: Do not use handz off anti-masturbatory cream more than ten times per day.Side effects may include hairy palms and blindness. Should abnormal swelling occur, consult a hooker.

Tuesday 27 May 2008

Talking Shit or doing a Shit?



Have you ever seen a real Shit Box? I’m not using the term as an adjective for the cardboard, I’m just relaying the Product name. The portable toilet is for those moments when you get the urge for number two on the road, but don’t have access to a proper toilet and many a time that does happen!

“The box pops up from a convenient flat pack to a rigid, reusable, comfortable toilet,” the Brown Corporation describes. “Each box comes with ten degradable poo bags.”

Just like you wouldn’t leave your dog’s poop on the side of the road you shouldn’t leave a heap of your own poo either. Instead of scooping, just do your business right in the, er, stool-shaped box to avoid making a mess.

I think i will have to buy one.

Monday 26 May 2008

I want one!


If I had 15 million squid i would live in a House like this on a little-known island called Nurai, located northeast of Abu Dhabi city.

Each “Seaside” estate will include a private beach and garden, rooftop garden with spa pool, infinity swimming pool, indoor reflecting pools, concealed service quarters, entertainment patios, outdoor dining areas, chef and show kitchens and outdoor showers.

Tuesday 13 May 2008

Miss Vera


Going to school is difficult for some people, They don't fit in and feel awkward!

Maybe this is the school for them: Miss Vera's Finishing school!

Welcome to the world's first and only cross-dressing academy, the place where dreams can and do come true.

Yes you to could learn to be a cross dresser!

What can you learn at the academy? Well here are a few things:

Cosmetology
Let's Make-up. Make-up application.
Wigged Out. The care and feeding of your hair.
Nail Call. Manicures and Pedicures.
Hair Today. Shaving and other types of hair removal.
Physical Education
Walking and High heels. Well-heeled.
Dance and port de bras. Ballet One and tu-tu.
How to Strip. Take it off.
Body Building and corset training. Of corset.
Communications
Voice and elocution. Girl Talk. Social Conversation.
Flirting Fundamentals.
Home Economics
Cooking. Domestic Bliss. Sewing. Maid Training. Servant Problems and Solutions. Etiquette & Table Manners.
Tea Service. Tea for You.
Female Music Appreciation. From humdrum to divadom.
Sex Education
Femmeself acceptance. How to share your femmeself with your partner. Understanding female genitalia. Femalia.
Facts about Fantasies.
Herstory
Create a herstory.

What more could a budding young lady ask for!

Sunday 4 May 2008

Girls Aloud


So anyway! Crazy Leah rings me up at 4.30 and asks if i want to go to the Girls Aloud concert at 7pm, I decided yeah what the heck!

Turns out to be a bloody good gig!
I was totally impressed and it does not hurt that they are all hot!

Friday 2 May 2008

Not a bad advert


How long would it take you to shear your lawn with your razor blade? Impossible, right? With your shaver, probably, but hey, if you had a Bic, maybe not!

This creative “Grass Cutter” Billboard for Bic razors is an awesome example of guerrilla marketing. The only issue with something like this is getting people to the area—no doubt those who are in the vicinity will notice it, but where do you place something like this to ensure it gets the right exposure?

Bic placed this ad in Japan, and I guess if they want to ensure its impact, the daily mowing would make it pretty high maintenance!

Those crazy Japanese and their wacky Adverts!
For Gary it is also a advert for the airport strip that some ladies have!

The awesome M2 motorway


To get home from Belfast i have to travel on the M2 motorway which i have grown to love!
Now most of you will probably be thinking "Is Gohir smoking crack again" well no!
I love the stretch of motorway home, it's so entertaining and because it's not the busiest motorway it gives me time to think and look around!

Here's a list of thing i've seen, enjoyed and happened on the motorway:

1) I've had two crashes on the motorway:
One where i hit black ice and smashed into the crash barrier! (intense!)
The other where some spazz drove into the back of me!
2) I have seen a badger sauntering down the hard-shoulder not giving a fuck!
3) I have seen numerous roadkill including:
Badger
Horse
Cat
Dog
Fox
And loads of other animals!
4) I once saw a cow taking a pee and then another cow putting it's face in the pee stream! (still makes me chuckle to this day!!)
5) Other people being stopped by the filth! (I know they will stop me some day)
6) A giant snowball rolling down the hill and crashing through the fence then landing on the motorway
7) And other stuff that i have forgotten but did enjoy at the time

A moral for all days

So knackered!

I've travelled all the way down to the bottom of Ireland for a spot of filming and after a world wind 2 days of intense filming and driving all on my own i'm now home and sorted!

So the moral of this post always eat your greens!

Wednesday 23 April 2008

My life is so complicated!



Gemma Atkinson or Holly Valance?

Who shall i pick?
It's such a dilemma being me!!

Monday 21 April 2008

Bastard MOT!


My poor G-Mobile failed the bastard MOT!

I hate the MOT it's got way harder with stupid light tests and other pointless things!

My new name is Spazzy McGee!

I am such a spazz for not blogging! I'm getting far too lazy!

But i have now been Blogrolled by Cyberscribe Cyberscroll (he sounds like a Superhero) and he is a proper blogger so i might get some hits from his site, I have to keep blogging!

I will be back blogging this week!

Monday 7 April 2008

Public Transport is so not Cool!


Oh My God! What a craazzee day!

The G-Mobile was out of action today so i had to get public transport today!!! Well I have not been on a bus or train for about 7 years and holy shit has the price risen! In my day i remember a single from Belfast to Antrim was £1.70, It's now £3.20!! Bastard Translink and their Buses!

Although it was a fun journey and a new experience of travelling train and bus in one day it's not something i want to do everyday! It's way cheaper to get the car!

I wish the bus was like the one in the picture, it look way more awesome!

Sunday 6 April 2008

No Internet in Ireland!

This is so Gay, I was away but now I'm back home and had no chance to blog while i was travelling around!
The reason being that most of the hotels i stayed in down south had no internet what so ever!

I'm annoyed!

Sunday 30 March 2008

On the Road Again!

Hello!

Well I'm on the road again traveling across Ireland to do a bit of filming for RTE, I'm in Shannon Town for the next 2 days which is weird as i have not been here for six years, it's changed quite a bit and for the better cause it used to be a real shit hole!
Then we are filming in Lahinch.

I know it's a short post but frankly i have nowt to say, but i'm sure i'll blog more over the week.

Toodle PiP!

Monday 17 March 2008

Happy St Patrick's Day!



I thought i would share this video made for "The Gohir Way of life" by my friends from Playboy™

Happy Birthday Hoff!


Happy Birthday Hoff!

Saturday Night we all went out for Clare O'Hofferty's Birthday!
Unfortunately at the last moment she could not make it as other events clashed but we decided we would go out for Sushi anyway!

We went to Sakura on Botanic for sushi which was Goooood!
The best thing about it was the fact that the table next to us got little birds made out of carrots! When they were about to leave we asked if we could have them and they said yes!
And now Gary has one attached to his shoulder like a Pirate!
We then headed down to the Duke Of York for a few Cokes and waters!
We substituted the Hoff for Charlie Brown!

So overall a good night of company, sushi and drinky poos!

Happy Birthday Hoff!

Oh and by the way Emma was there too!

The Blue Room


YO YO YO!

So last week I went back to my old Haunt "BBC NI" to see all the new technologies that are coming up for the new world.

It was hosted by the man of the moment Charlie Brown in Studio 1 and the event was known as "The Blue Room" there was loads of cool toys to play with and some great new products which should make my job easier although the best thing there was a Nintendo WII which i did not get anywhere near as everyone was playing tennis on it!

Tuesday 11 March 2008

A Happy Video


I'd like to share a video from my youth.
It always makes me happy.

And just to say this video was made when i was 11 and she was 16, she was my first crush and it's good to remember innocent days!

Turn the music up and reminisce.

Disclaimer: This is not pedophiliac in any nature! That disclaimer was for you Mr Watson before you comment about it!

Monday 10 March 2008

Big Game Hunting


I have this weird fascination about going out and and shooting an animal! Not just any old animal! I want to go Big Game hunting and shoot me an Elephant or a Dinosaur or some other suitable sized animal!

I don't know where this fascination has come from but I would like to do it!
I don't know why it appeals to me but it does!

I wonder if i can do it?

Friday 7 March 2008

Victoria Square


Awesome to the fact that we now have a brand new Shopping Center in Belfast which opened yesterday!

It's called Victoria Square and it has been years in the making! It has all brand new shops to Belfast and looks really fab! It also has a Nando's which is awesome and a Puma store.
The flagship store is House of Frazer which apparently is the biggest in the whole of the UK and a Hugo Boss store and an Apple Store coming soon!

We went to the opening yesterday and it was rammed with people so i didn't get a proper look, but i intend to go next week when all the hype has died down and i can look at the shops without all the crowds!

Bon Voyage John


Well finally my friend John has left these shores for Australia!

You might remember him from such incidents as:
Throwing Simon into a bus shelter!
Having the best friggin parties ever!
Total awesome dude!
Collector of pure crap!
and all round ladies man|!

Well he has gone to sow his wild oats around the world!

Good luck John

Goat/Sheep type thing


While I was wondering around Ireland on my tour I was in the Mountains of Knockmealdown which were beautiful, I flew round the corner and into a Goat/Sheep type creature, It made a funny noise at me then gave me a dirty look then sauntered away!

I took a Picture of it before it scuttled away!

Sunday 2 March 2008

I need to get out more.

I've really got to get out and do some more interesting things!
The Blog is suffering!

Monday 25 February 2008

Yummy!



I love Apple and now i love them even more!

I need.......

Excitement

Boring

I am so bored with everything.

What Direction?


I'm not really in the mood.

And yes i'm sorry for not blogging!

I feel left out of the Northern Ireland blogging scene, should I write about more Northern Ireland type stuff or keep going the way I am?

Wednesday 13 February 2008

New Pepsi?


What have you been doing this past decade?
Pepsi has done nothing to add to their brand. Until now, the launch of Pepsi Raw that is. The “healthy” soda is made from all natural ingredients. (Aren’t sugar and water natural ingredients?)

Pepsi says using corn syrup is better. The drink, designed by Ziggurat Brands, doesn’t have the fizz and looks pretty pale compared to other cola drinks.

It also look tasteless! But who am i to complain? I'll drink any sort of crap!

Sunday 10 February 2008

Congrats to Rosa & Jason


Many of you remember my good friend Rosa of "Rosa Blogs" the now defunct blog i have a link too, Well for a while we all thought she batted for the other team even after we advertised for a man for her, you might remember she liked long walk and puppies!
Well nobody took her.

So Rosa faced with a challenge went out and found herself a man! and not just any man! Oh no she went and found herself "The Bolger" part man part machine!
Jason Bolger is a totally awesome dude and we're not to sure what he is doing with her! (we think she drugged him)

But they have been together for a while and Rosa even went to America to live with Jason and whilst out there our Rosa has decided to make an honest man out of him and now she is now known as Rosa Campbell-Blight-Bolger.

Cause, Oh yeah they have went out and just got Married!!

Well done dudes, Congratulations!

Monday 4 February 2008

ANTM 9


Welcome to America's Next Top Model

I love this show and have been watching since series one and it gets better every year

Tyra and the team return for ANTM 9 on Monday, February 4th at 9pm on living Tv.

From the very glamorous, to high-tech to controversial, the 13 hopefuls give it their all to impress Tyra, Jay Manuel, Nigel, Twiggy and of course, Miss J! T

I love this show cause there is loads of hot birds!

City Hall Belfast


I must say City Hall is not looking to bad.

Dessie's Birthday.


Friday night was the Birthday bash for Mr Desmondo Thompson son of Edwardo Thompson 3rd earl of Killead!

And was it celebrated in style!
We busted moves in the Apartment where the drink of the night was a very fruity metrosexual Strawberry Daiquiri! In which Desmondo thrived on!
Then on to the Potthouse where we boogied to the sounds of 50 Cent and Go, go, go, go, go, go Go, shorty It's your birthday We gon' party like it's your birthday We gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birthday!

We ripped it up that night and the Thompson didn't even throw up which shows he can now handle his drink!

Here he is ripping it up!

Tuesday 22 January 2008

Restaurant Music!


Following on from last nights musical mayhem at the Italian restaurant I thought about all the restaurants i've been too around the world and the one thing they all have in common is, is that none of them play decent background music!

Niche restaurants that serve "ethnic" foods i believe and this is only my opinion should have music from the country that the food is from! Indian restaurants=Indian music, Italian=Italian music, Ethiopian=Ethiopian music and so on and so on! Not bloody movie soundtracks or disco tunes, I want to hear Ethiopian boys chanting or Malaysian bears mating music not bloody Celine Dion and that bloody Titanic song! and no more fucking pan pipes!

Monday 21 January 2008

On the road again!

Well I'm back on the road again!
Although this time I'm not traveling the world I'm staying closer to home and traveling across Ireland, green and pleasant land full of ugly birds and fat men! Now I'm not disrespecting Ireland it's just that "God" there is some ugly people around!

But enough of that little rant, I'm in Wicklow town tonight, it's not a bad little place a bit boring but I'm sure it has it's charms, I just don't have time to really see it. I did go to a little Italian place called Casapepe which wasn't a bad place apart from the tunes they played, I listened to the "Locomotion" by Kyle then "It's raining men" and then i realised all the songs they have played were gay anthems!! I was in a gay Italian restaurant!

The food was alright but the tunes were a bit to gay for a Monday night!

Friday 18 January 2008

Lovely beard


I'm a big fan of the Japanese and their crazy ways and i'm also a big fan of facial hair as i'm not able to grow mine that well so i was very happy when i saw this great invention!

Realistic facial hair that looks cool!

I think we will also witness an increase in the number of fellas sporting some form of facial fashion. A working life of close shaven conformity perhaps prodding them to, for want of a better expression, let their hair down a little.

However, while hairstyles may vary from the sensible to the silly, when it comes to a dash of colour, nothing but a manga-inspired mane will do — all the way from grey to somewhat gaudy gold.

I would order a nice handlebar mustache but the site is in Japanese!

Introducing the C-String!!


Just when you think they can't really do anything else to underwear, they invent something like this. The C-String I'm not sure what holds it up, and I'm not sure how comfortable they are, but if you hate panty lines or tan lines, then this is for you ladies out there who have been longing to conquer them.


It does look like a shoe horn though!

Thursday 17 January 2008

Why?


Is there a point to this?

Even I wonder?

Tuesday 15 January 2008

Simon's Birthday Brunch with Dog


Hey Dudes,

Had a nice relaxing weekend, it was Simon's Birthday on Monday! so we surprised him with a surprise brunch at Ruby Tuesdays on Sunday morning which i have to say the food was just adequate! (very inadequate fry! Gary you must investigate!)

So anyway i spent ages figuring what to get Simon as he is a hard to buy for and then i remembered his love of dogs but because he lives in an apartment he could never get one! So i done the next best thing and bought him a lovely blue plastic doggy!

Wednesday 2 January 2008

2008


Well the New Year has arrived and i have a new job, well a new contract for a different programme, one that involves no more travel around the world!! Boohoo! not good! no more jaunts around the world!

But anyway 2008 should be a good year, so i say roll it on.