My photography skills are being recognised!

I have a Flickr account, not many pictures on it as it takes ages to load up but i got a email from a young lady asking if she could use one of my pictures of the WaterFront Hall for a website called Schmap which are online interactive maps

Shmap!: "Exploring a Schmap Guide is a uniquely interactive experience: maps and guide content are dynamically integrated, allowing intuitive, real-time access to reviews and photo slideshows for places of interest"

Anyway my pic has been used to describe the Waterfront (as well as some others) which is awesome!

The Des has a son!

The big news story of the year is that my good friend Mr Dessie Thompson and his good partner Lisa have had a baby boy!!

Hooray! He was born a couple of days before xmas and is called Rory (Hope this is the right spelling)

No pic yet but i'll take one and post it!

Christmas is over.

Well Christmas is officially over!

Is it just me or did it sneak up really quick and pinch you on the bum and then run away!
As I'm getting older xmas just seems to sneak up and go, no more fanfare, no more razzmatazz, it used to be a lot better when i was a kid, it seemed to last longer and the Tv was a lot better!

Maybe I'm being cynical what with my family all away for xmas and getting no prezzies! (I hope your reading this dessie) but xmas is losing it's charm!

So anyway thats my xmas rant over,

IKEA Belfast Grand Opening!

Hello and Welcome or as the say in Sweden "Var snäll och prata långsammare"!

The reason for the Swedish outburst is because today after a bazillion years after everyone else including China a developing country we get our first IKEA for the whole of Ireland!!! A great behemoth well known for its modern, utilitarian design Woohoo!

Me and the "Hoff" from work went today to the grand opening where we were expecting long queues down the roads and thousands of customers but apparently one of the dudes who work there told us that the media had scared loads of people away by saying that there would be queues and thousands of people! so that worked in our favour as we worked our way round the store which are designed around a "one-way" layout which leads customers along "the long natural way".

This layout is designed to encourage the customer to see the store in its entirety the sequence involves going through furniture showrooms, housewares (market-hall), then the warehouse (Self Serve) where one collects flatpacks for products seen in the showrooms, and then arrive at the cashier's station to make payment.... Awesome!

We didn't have much time as it was our lunch break and because we were seen by our chief we quickly moved around and picked up a photo frame and some finger puppets!

Thats the Hoff beside a swedish Viking who i thought were all from Norway! They should have had more ABBA there!

3rd part of The Poem!

Post coitial spasms
Borne from great orgasms
lying back smoking on your Super kings
These are few of my favourite things

Sleazy and teasy
As easy as peasy
A family bucket of hot chicken wings
These are a few of my favourite things

Shagging and dragging the dead bodies away
Mind out for the neighbors, oh what would they say
Put then in bin bags all tied up with string
These are a few of my favourite things

Slicing and dicing clawing and sawing
look out for the filth and be on your way
Snapping and breaking and stealing the rings
These are a few of my favorite things.

2nd part of The Poem

Candyfloss nipples
Jokes about cripples
Doggy style Sundays meaningless flings
These are a few of my favourite things

Leather clad Goth chicks with
Inverted cross dicks
Bisto on Sunday with my gravy rings
These are a few of my favourite things

A Poem

Recently we have had a unknown person writing a poem on my blog in the comment section, and it has been decided by me and the lads in the office that it deserves a blog of it's own cause it's brilliant:

So without further ado the lyrical rhyming of Seamus Heaney and Philip Larkin:

Goosebumps and Udders
Sharp knives and cutters
Scabies and flatulence, big wasps that sting
These are a few of my favourite things

Stanley blades in golf balls
Scissors in free-fall
Riots with peelers and gays with cock rings
These are a few of my favourite things

Smooth shiney ball-bags
And leather-clad street slags
Pig sweat poppers and bingo wings
These are a few of my favourite things

Fighting with wheel-braces
And smashing up faces
Drinking in the park setting fire to swings
These are a few of my favourite things

My Shoe Dilemma

I am having a real dilemma at the moment!!!!

My favorite trainers for the past 3 years are getting harder and harder to find!

They are the Puma Mostro, Truly a wonderful comfortable trainer that looks good.
Puma has stopped making them.
I have even resorted to going to Ebay looking for them.

So if anyone knows where i can get a size 11 tell me or i'm going to poke you in the eye!

Fucking Insomnia December

What the fuck is up with December, every frikkin December for the past 3 years i have suffered from insomnia!!

Why only in December? Is there some sort of weird december insomnia bug going around?

I'm not happy!

A real Alaskan

This is a real Alaskan wilderness dude!

He goes around hunting and shooting and building shelters all around the woods,

If you cross him you end up being stuffed by the local taxidermist!

We got on well.

A Moose loose aboot this house

I was about to shoot me a moose in these parts but my parade got rained on!

Alaska day..... who knows!

Bonjour from Alaska!

It's all going well up here, it's still cold but i'm getting used to it now!

Filming is going well, only a few mishaps but other than that it's all ship shape and Bristol fashion!

This is where God gave me a sign, and he said.. "Wrap up warm my son"

North Pole

Apparently it's a city and we are quite close by to it!

Alaska is weird

I'm at my filming destination of Delta Junction in Alaska!! It's known as the Friendly Frontier and has a population of around a thousand people of whom 350 are inbred!

It's a real weird town, people eat Buffalo Burgers and there are no chain stores at all, just weird little diners and strange shops that sell moose poo!

Filming has got off to a good start and can only get better as Alaska is frikkin beautiful, the scenery where we are is so beautiful, snow is on the ground and mountains are looking really cool, the only flaw is, is that it's bloody freezing!!! It was minus 18 today, i had about 20 layers on and still froze!!

So cold! Brrrr!

Alaska is bloody cold!

Hello from Alaska!!!

It's so bloody cold here!!! I'm freezing my ass off,
Stepped out of the airport and had to go back in put on another layer and then walked to the hire car!! It's so cold!!

So cold! But really pretty!

But still damn cold!

Blog

God, I haven't blogged in ages!

Your own Tissue Box!

For just $5, you can create a custom Kleenex Box

At that price point, the customization is clearly a marketing strategy for Kleenex… and I dig it!

The site describes, “Let Out Your Creative Juices! Create your own Kleenex® Oval tissue box and bring your personal style and vision to life. Celebrate a special occasion, feature a silly moment or simply show anything that makes you smile. Only $4.99 + shipping.”

Really cool idea and would make a great present

Only frickin problem is, is that they don't deliver in Europe!

Gay!

Another BurgerKing update!

Whilst walking past the local BurgerKing in Belfast i saw in the window that they have reintroduced the Ocean Catch which is a fish burger!
I remember they had it about 10 years ago then stopped it in the UK and I had only seen it since being served in America and Europe but it appears they have brought it back!

It's tastier than McDonalds Fillet-O-Fish and consists of a deep-fried white fish patty, Tartar sauce and lettuce on a sesame seed roll.

Try it now! I said now!

Spicy BeanBurger Update

Update:

Due to my extensive campaigning to BurgerKing they have reinstated the Spicy BeanBurger!
Truly the greatest burger in the BurgerKing arsenal!


I went to my local BurgerKing drive thru and ordered it!

It was Glorious!

That is all.

Vending Machine Bread!

If you are living in Japan then consider yourself as a lucky skunk for endless reasons. But today’s reason for believing your self to be fortunate is that you won't need to buy a fresh loaf of bread every second day. All you got to do is stuff your kitchen cabinets with Canned Bread that are sold from the vending machines. It is real Bread that comes in a can and stays fresh for up to three years that too without preservatives.

Ou est la Bush?

In a day and age where women and indeed men are being plucked, waxed and lasered within an inch of their lives it's interesting to see a company that embraces the adult form as nature decided.

In the ole days, the odd stray side pube was seen as a hint of a deeper, darker forest of femininity but in modern times the idea that our nether regions reflect anything other than a version of our pre-pubescent selves is pretty much unheard of.

I'm not too sure!

Back is Fucked!

My back is fucked, I have slipped a disc!

So much pain!

Flying home on a Jet plane!

We're flying back to good old Blighty today and yet again I'm blogging from an Airport!
Crraaazzzyyy!

Anyway according to my calculations in the two weeks i have been away i have flown 11 times and have travelled a bajillion miles!

South Padre day 2

I have spent a lovely day at South Padre, We done our recce in the morning which was really good and got to go on a speed boat.

Then i chilled for the rest of the day and spent it looking around the island and stopping for a coke and an Ice-cream.
Drove up the coast and stopped and chilled on the beach and watched the Sunset!

Sweet! I'm starting to like my job!

Pawn

I thought it said Porn!

Airport Blogging!

I'm at Phoenix airport and I'm blogging!

Never blogged from an Airport before so this is a first for the Gohir Way of Life!

Not much to report apart from the fact I'm going to South Padre Island which is known for Spring Break which to Non-American old folk means girls showing their boobs and getting drunk! WooHoo!

Unfortunately it happens during Spring and I'm going today! BooHoo!

Grand Canyon

Tottaly awesome day!

We drove the 3 hours from Scottsdale to the Grand Canyon! Man it was so awesome!
It's something you can not imagine, you see it on Tv but Tv does it no justice, you need to see it up real! It's mind blowing!

You drive up and you can't see a thing and then Bham! a big fucking huge glorious hole in the ground!

The Canyon is an overwhelming experience, and nothing can prepare you for the sight; superlatives often fail to do the landscape justice.
The Grand Canyon is a massive canyon carved over several million years by the Colorado River. Grand Canyon National Park has an elevation change of nearly 7,000 feet (2130 m) from Point Imperial (at nearly 9,000 feet or 2740 m) to the banks of Lake Mead (at just over 2,000 feet or 610 m).
The canyon itself is, from rim to river over a mile (1610 m) deep. In spots the rock layers exposed in the canyon display over two billion years of geologic history. There is no way that mere words can describe the place. You just have to see it.

Here is a pic of the canyon and me with some Japanese dudes i met!

Mmmm Sushi!

After a hard day of hot and humid work we have just come back from a really nice restaurant called Steel in Dallas which served some fantastic sushi!

Now i've only recently been introduced to sushi, but i'm already a big fan, and this was real good as i was told by some of our crew who are big sushi eaters.

Howdy

Howdy Y'all!

I'm now in the state of Texas! Yee Haw indeed!

We got in today after a couple of days filming in Arizona which i have to say was a really nice place, real nice like! We stayed in Mesa which is near Scottsdale which is really nice, It was gloriously hot and when I say hot I mean real hot, the hot you get in an oven! I was sweating like a whore in a brothel!

Didn't get to take too many pics as we were busy working, which went really well.

So i will leave you at that.

Roswell

Hello and welcome to my blog from the States!

I have spent the last 2 days in Craazzzyyyy Roswell! Home of the Alien and the Dairy capital of the south west, apparently!

We were here to do a spot of filming which went very well and we stayed in this fabulous hunting lodge in the middle of nowhere! No phone signal and no interwebnet, but boy was it worth it!
Fresh clean air, beautiful sunsets, wide open spaces wildlife, rednecks! What more could a chap ask for?!

The lodge we stayed in was really nice, a classic Mexican style house! Although my only complaint was that it had a couple of tarantulas wondering around outside, but they didn't bother me cause they knew i was a double hard bastard!

So enjoy my pics of the lodge and sunset.

Mariachi here I come!

I have left my job in the media and have decided to join a Mariachi band instead!
Screw you all!

Mariachi is a type of musical group, originally from Mexico. Usually a mariachi consists of at least two violins, two trumpets, one Spanish guitar, one vihuela and one guitarrón (a small-scaled acoustic bass).

They dress in silver studded charro outfits with wide-brimmed hats.

And that explains that!

America Hoozah!

Hello from America again!

I am in (Alberquwerky,) (Albaqeurque), (Albajerky) er.... New Mexico! After a 24 hour journey that involved 3 planes we arrived at our hotel and i am fucked! I feel like a badgers ass that's been lying in the road for 2 days (yes i do know what a badgers ass is like as i was told by a mate who has had experience with badgers!) and am so tired I'm gonna fall asleep writing this!

We are going to drive to Roswell today which should be fun as i want to meet some aliens and Roswell is the alien capital in the world! We are there to do some filming, it's a 3 hours drive but should be a nice scenic route through the desert.

I'm now signing off as i want to catch some zzzzzz's.

Here is a pic of some cactus and palm trees which seem to be plentiful around these parts.

Here Kitty!

I've decided i would like a pet, but i want a cool one and one that is unique and i like cats so this is the one for me!

The Ashera is like a mini-Leopard, spots and all, but it's really a cool blend between an African Serval and the Asian Leopard Cat bred with a domestic cat.
This giant house cat can reach weights up to 30 pounds, can be walked on a leash, is highly intelligent and surprisingly gets along well with people and children. The downside of an Ashera is of course the $20,000 price tag

The Best man

I was best man at my friends Danny's wedding, it was a brilliant wedding made better by my speech!

Here is pic of the bride and groom.

Birthday prezzies!

Went to Starbucks tonight to meet simon who very kindly gave me my birthday presents!

He gave me a really nice book on Penguin photography cause i love penguins, a nice hand moisturiser and a mug that has a picture of a women in a bikini and when you pour hot liquids into it the bikini disappears!

Haven't tried it yet but i will post the results here!

Sunday

So after the big night out on Saturday after i got home by four i managed to get out of bed and go to the Belfast Mela in Botanic Gardens which was organised by the Indian Community of Northern Ireland.

I have to say it was really good, they had Bhangra dancers, a theatre group doing Bollywood style dancing, a classic Sitar player, Chinese dragons as well as loads of good food and some other stalls selling stuff that was not really Indian related but it filled the area up so it was not to bad!

There was a real good atmosphere and loads of people were there and it was nice to be around so many Asian folk as it brings me back to my roots! Although i was born here and have spent most of my life here i still like to have roots!

In the pic are some of the Bhangra dancers.

Saturday Night

Hey Gang! Well i have been very lax on the old blogging front so I'll give you a quick run down on what's been happening!

On Saturday night me and Simon went to Sakura for some sushi, which i have to say was not to bad for Belfast, had a really nice time just chillin and catching up, Then we went down town and met up with me old mucker John and his bird as well as Dave and his sis and mate, we decided to venture into the old PottHouse for a wee boogie and drinkie poo!

I have to say it was a real good night! The PottHouse has been lacking for quite a while but in Saturday it was back on form with loads of people and some top totty which for some weird reason in Belfast only come out in the summer!

Had a really good time and everyone was drunk apart from me!

Oh and in the picture John is Freebasing!

Apologies

Sorry guys for not blogging, i didn't have time as i had a couple of weddings and i just was not in the mood to be honest!

But i will try and get thing started again for you loyal fans who have followed me through thick and thin!

Small boobs + cookies = big boobs

Feeling a little flat? Snack your way to a bigger rack!

For those ladies who suffer unhappiness due to a surfboard-like chest, there’s an alternative to painful, costly, unnatural plastic surgery. All you have to do is chow down on two “F-Cup Cookies” a day and your boobs will reach an F-cup.

So says the Japanese company that packs each magical cookie with a 50mg dose of Pueraria Mirifica, a plant found in Thailand and Myanmar. Wikipedia says, “Its tuber contains phtoestrogens such as miroestrol, deoxymiroestrol, and coumestans, and is used in breast enhancement supplements.”

So ladies, i say give it a try!

Hello

Well it's been a long time since i have blogged so i do apologize to my loyal readers!

A few things to mention:
Gary is away for a month filming so we will be low on comments, so please do feel free to comment (apart from dessie!)
Rosa is now not looking for anyone! She found someone else that likes puppies and long walks!
I have to now fend for myself as my mum is on holiday and there is no-one to cook my food, so any food parcels would be greatly appreciated!

And lastly according to the counter thingy on my blog it appears i have now loads more readers from around the world!

Mustache Revolution!

For many months now i have been hoping for the Mustache to make a come back, I think it was always a valuable member of the hair family. A chap looked pretty dapper with an upper lip warmer.

Now i have a tried to grow a proper mustache but i can never style it! I want a handle bar one or one that twirls at the end! So I'm now going to recommend that we all buy these!


Start a mustache wearing revolution with a self-adhesive stache for every day of the week.


Update: Ok for some reason the link goes to a different site, but take it from me they are a good buy if you can find them anywhere!

5.0 rained on my parade!

Well it all kicked off tonight when i was drivin down to me local 24 hour Tesco to get me a quart of milk and a tin of Rubicon Guava!

I was blazin down the road in the G-Mobile when the local 5.0 pulled me over and started hasslin me about my broken headlight and i was like yeah! and what's it to you Fascist?! and then he dissed me and told me that i was gonna get a ticket! So i was like wha? I said no way copper i only had that light replaced two weeks ago!

So he took my license into the pig mobile and checked it out on his tappity tap and came back and he knew i was gonna bitch slap him so he let me off but breathalised me instead!

It was negative and i was like ya see copper! Nah go do your job!

(It really happened like that apart from the attitude! I was like yes sir no sir!)

Autobots! Roll out!

Dudes i have just been to see Transformers!
We managed to get freebie premier tickets to see it!

Holy shit! It was brilliant, fantastic, it's a live-action Michael Bay spectacular, and arrives considerably augmented by an array of rather impressive, computer-generated special effects.

The first hour of the movie is heavier on comedy than action, following the hero as he's befuddled to learn of his Camaro's (an american car, he should have been a beetle like the original) metamorphic abilities. He tries to keep it all a secret from his parents (Kevin Dunn, Julie White), who suspect his strange behavior is hormonal. The plot hinges on Sam finding a magical cube called the Allspark. The protective aliens, known as Autobots, are trying to keep the cube away from the evil Decepticons, who plan to use the powers of the interplanetary object for global domination. Thus, the stage is set for car chases, street fights and air attacks pitting machine against machine, with ground support from the humans.

Although the film can't quite eclipse the glorious Saturday morning cartoon silliness of the 1986 animated "Transformers" movie, it more than stands its ground.

Man i totally loved this movie, so recommend it!

A bit slow

Bloody hell it been a long time since i blogged!
Sorry folks!

Well i have had an eventful time since i last spoke, I have seen the new Harry Potter movie which was really good, I'm a huge fan of the Potter and this film delivered, really slick and portrayed the books well.

Also my good friend Laura had her Birthday last weekend, it was a fabulous bash where everyone had to dress up as a celebrity, the personality not the character! I had a bit of a dilemma to what i should go as, in the end i threw on a suit and went as "Krishnan Guru Murphy" from channel 4 news! I was the belle of the ball!
There were a few Pete docherty's, a couple of Lilly Allens, a Peter and Jordon and others i cant remember, really good party and I'm glad Laura had it although she now has a dickey leg after she popped her knee cap in a dance off! Oh and she was terribly tipsy!

Hostel II

Went to the cinema tonight with me old mucker Simon, We watched Hostel II which i can honestley say was rubbish compared to the first one, There was no gore, no suspence or thriller it was very tame compared to the original movie!

It’s not that I don’t recommend this movie to fans of the original. I’m just lamenting the fact that the film isn’t nearly what it could have been.

Save yourself some money and don't go or else buy yourself a nice ice-cream!

The Rain in Spain!

What the fuck is up with the weather?
I left the country and it was sunny, i'm in America and it was glorious sunshine and lollipops (well not really lollipops) and i come back to this shitty weather!

Not Happy!

Is it a sign God?

It's the Law!

Back home!

Well dudes, i'm back in town!

Came back on Tuesday and am still jet lagged!

Everything back home feels smal, My bedroom feels small, probably cause i'm used to hotel rooms, The G-Mobile feels small after driving the huge American 4x4's and i also forgot that my car is automatic and stalled at the lights! But thank fuck i'm back to normal portions of food cause i would end up a huge blimp and all my good work at the gym would be for nothing.

So i'm now back home and i leave you with some of my memories of the US of A!