Shooooes!

I am a lover of the Puma shoes and have tried too buy as many pairs as i can! I have them in green, white, blue, white/blue, blue/red, brown/cream and so on and so on!

Anyway, Puma have got this great thing on their website where you can custom build your own Puma shoe!

How bloody brilliant is that?! I have tried it but it got too complicated but will try when i have more time!

Wee Houses!

I can't afford a house anywhere in our great and green island! (Well i can but then there would be no point to this post and that would mean it's been too long since i last posted which has annoyed some of my loyal readers!)

So i have found these Little Houses that are already made and can be brought to wherever you want! And they only cost $45,000 or 22,500 roughly of our pound sterling!

So why not locate one of these in the middle of the mountains, lake or Sheugh and have a spanky new cabin?
Complete factory-built dwellings that arrive on trucks ready to live in.
Available as studios, one- and two-bedroom, kitchen/living, sleeping, and stair models.
Can be customized or combined to fit any need
On-site work includes the foundation, utility hookups (sewer, water or electrical supply), and simple fitting of the modules.

I'm gonna buy three and build me a little house on the prairie!

Trademark

I am now going to trademark everything!™

Holy Signage! Batman!

Courtesy of www.batmania.com.ar

High or Low?

I'm in a conundrum on what to write about today, Should i go high or low brow?
Some of my listeners like the high brow stuff i blog about but others enjoy the low end stuff.

So here is what i am gonna do, i will scour the web and come back to you later.

In the mean time amuse yourselves with a picture of a bush and my mate Dessie throwing up.

Direction

My life is without direction, therefore I propose to set sail down the Orinoco River in a canoe!

The Orinoco is one of the longest rivers in South America at 2,410 km, (1,497.5 miles). Its drainage basin, sometimes called the Orinoquia, covers 880,000 km², 76.3% in Venezuela with the rest in Colombia. The Orinoco and its tributaries are the major transportation system for eastern and interior Venezuela and the llanos of Colombia. And is also a Womble!

Think about it.

Olá! Desejo-lhe umas boas férias!

Life is a strange thing, to quote G.W.F. Hegel (1770 – 1831) “The owl of Minerva spreads its wings only with the falling of the dusk.”
Only after the end of an age can philosophers realize what it was about. And by then it’s too late to change things.

“The life of man [is] solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.” – Thomas Hobbes (1588 – 1679)
Man is born free, and he is everywhere in chains, we find ourselves living a savage, impossible life without education and the protection of the state. Human nature is bad: we’ll prey on one another in the most vicious ways. No doubt the state imposes on our liberty in an overwhelming way.

“I think therefore I am” – René Descartes (1596 – 1650)

Cowbell

I've got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.

The Beast.

Hello

A few of you lovely readers (simon and patsy) have wondered what i refer to as the beast in my insomnia poem!

Releasing the beast is a metaphor for sleep, as in i need to get some sleep, the beast is sleep and it's haunting me.
Now i know you dirty minded folk thought it meant knocking one out! But it's not. Your dirty folk and need to wash your minds with soap!

Whats Happening?

On the way to work i saw a dead sheep, dead cat and a shoe.

Is it an omen? Are more sinister things to come?

Sleep!

It's now been a month and a half and i'm still suffering from insomnia.

Sleep is beyond my grasp
I’m falling fast
Into the black night
Where no dreams give me fright

Lying in my bed at 3am
Staring up at the ceiling
I’ve lost all feeling
I need to sleep
No need to creep

I toss and turn without cease
Need to release the beast
Need to rest my mind
For more than a few minutes at a time

Insomnia is my cruel mistress
Showing no mercy, taunting me
No sound not even a peep
I need to sleep, I need to sleep

Gossip

I like to delve into what other people are doing and saying, so this Website is really good,

It’s a simple Blog space that posts handmade postcards spilling the deepest darkest secrets of their anonymous contributors. Ranging from funny to sexy, from sad to completely bizarre, the voyeur in all of us will keep us coming back for more

This is one of my favorites

R2-D2 Is a bad ass entertainment system!

I have always wanted my own R2-D2!

And he's not just a remote control recreation, he's a full blown home entertainment system, packing in a projector, DVD player, iPod connection and wireless FM transmission.

As well as pumping out tunes from your iPod, the genius addition of a projector means R2 can slap pictures on the wall or ceiling. Just under £1,300 for your own three wheeled slice of the Star Wars universe.

Pert!

I think a lot of women can do with These! A great invention!

Link via: TrendHunter.com

Style Awards

To my Mongolian brethren Sain baina uu, Jorlon haana baina ve?
They are avid readers to the Blog of Gohir!

So anyway, Last night was the Ulster Tatler style award in Cafe Vaudeville which i was graciously invited to, So myself and the sidekick John boy went down in our better than average clobber (but not to flash to the point it looked like we were going to a wedding)

There was free drink to keep John amused and an abundance of fit birds to keep me amused, (not that i am saying that John is an alcho and I'm a man whore!) There was the usual motley crew of Belfast's movers and shakers, we mingled and minced and traversed the room and met a few friends we haven't seen in a while, It was a bit slow and me and John did arrive halfway through the awards and could not see what was happening but overall a good night out.


That's Ralph McLean and Terry Bradley over in that pic.

I also met an old mate from when i was about 17, it was me old mucker Patsy who was looking glam-o-rama last night! and is now married and provides stress relief to people! Don't know how she does it but I'm assuming it comes with a happy finish! She works for Wellness NI, check them out if your stressed t'fuck!
That's John and Patsy in the pic, they do look better in real life! In this pic they look deranged!

Last Night

For all my Swahili readers out there! Jambo! Habari gani? Haraka haraka haina baraka!
I like to include everyone!

So anyway, after a hard days work i went to meet my chums Uel and my cousin at the old Botanical inn! I can fairly say it was a night full of many omens! Weird stalker woman (my cousin has this really weird stalker bird after him) were scaring us and crazy folk from fermanagh were coming up and talking weird shit to us, What were they trying to tell us? is it that we are too cool and women love us, or is it that we are too cool and women love us?

Then i was on my way home and i saw a fox and a ferret side by side ambling down the motorway, what does it mean? I think it means that we are on the wrong astral plane and uranus has been aligned with the Pluto the satellite formerly known as a planet.

I feel there is going to be strange times ahead!

Here's Hoping!

I'm hoping for this!

I'm annoyed!

I'm really starting to get pissed off at Holywood (pronounced Hollywood)
It's over priced!
Cold!
Limited!
Fuck all to do!

Maybe it's the winter and the fact that it is cold and not snowing that is putting me in the Holywood hating mood or the fact that i have had to eat a bloody egg and cress sandwich from Tesco's cause I'm broke! But I'm really not in the "I love Holywood mood"!

On a brighter note i did find this song that i have not heard in years by a french group called Alliance Ethnik! it's a really cool catchy song, very mellow and relaxing. It's cheered me up a bit.

I have no money!

It's only the start of the month and my money has gone! I hate unexpected bills they really fuck up the rotation!

BeanBurger Update!

I was in London over the weekend and had to catch a train to the airport from Liverpool street, had a half an hour to kill so i decided to get something to eat and walked passed the Burger King! Lo and behold they are selling the BeanBurger and a fish burger!

Bastards! Are they telling me lies? are they only not selling it in Northern Ireland?
I'm very annoyed! I will need to get this sorted!

So stay tuned for another update!

This is Gary

This is Gary!

The thorn in my side!
My online critic!
My Darth Vader to obi wan
My arch-nemesis!
Not my ying to his yang!
The devil in the red dress!

Ice hockey with Glo and not Simon!

Ni hao (Hello in mandarin)

Zai xing xi mian fei da cheng ta ren bian che de shou ce

My good friend Glo managed to score a couple of tickets to see the Belfast Giants ice hockey match, so she invited me as everyone else turned her down! (she smells of cat pee!) they were playing against Manchester Phoenix last night, now i was in a bit of a quandary in who i should support in last nights game! I love Manchester and lived there when i was younger, or should i support my country team, a bit like the Cricket test from Conservative MP Norman Tebbit in 1990.

"A large proportion of Britain's Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for? It's an interesting test. Are you still harking back to where you came from or where you are?"

I decided my loyalties ran with my country so Belfast Giants it was!! Go Giants!.....

.......Dozy bunch of bastards lost 2-1!
They fruited about like a bunch of figure skaters performing Dora the Explorer on ice! at one point of the match the goalkeeper had left the ice rink! maybe i need to brush up on my ice hockey rules but i don't think he should have done that!

So anyway, after we went to the Odyssey to watch skimpily dressed young ladies waiting in the queue to get in the Box, then on to the Limelight to watch a band called The Tides who were really good and managed by my friend Fergal, had a beer mat fight with Glo and then went home to try and pack for my trip to London tonight!